Should Parents Contact College Coaches?

Should Parents Contact College Coaches?

Deciding whether or not parents should reach out to college coaches is a common dilemma for families navigating the college recruiting process. On one hand, some argue that contacting coaches directly can help get a student-athlete’s name out there and on coaches’ radars. However, others warn that overstepping boundaries as a parent can backfire and hurt a student’s chances. There are pros and cons to consider when determining the best approach.

The Potential Benefits of Parents Contacting Coaches

Here are some possible advantages parents see in proactively reaching out to college coaches on their child’s behalf:

Introduction and Expression of Interest

One of the main reasons parents may want to contact coaches is simply to introduce their child and express interest in the school’s athletic program on their behalf. Coaches typically appreciate being made aware of prospective recruits. As long as the outreach is professional and not overly aggressive, it can be an effective way to get the student’s information to the coach and plant the seed of interest.

Provide Insights About the Student-Athlete

In initial contacts, parents can share details about their child that highlight their skills, character, academic and athletic accomplishments. Coaches have limited time to evaluate each potential recruit. Hearing personalized accounts of a student’s strengths, achievements and team contributions from a parent can help paint a fuller picture.

Ask About the Recruiting Process

Parents can use coach contacts to ask questions and gain insights about the college’s recruiting procedures and timelines. Having clarity on the coach’s process can help them properly position their child as a candidate. They can also gauge if their son or daughter would be a good fit for the program.

Express Logistical Interests Upfront

Reaching out gives parents the chance to mention key logistical interests, such as academic programs, financial aid options and geographic preferences. Communicating these details early allows the coach to see if they align with what the school can offer.

Develop Rapport With the Coach

When done respectfully, coach contacts create opportunities for parents and coaches to establish open lines of communication. Developing a positive rapport can facilitate information sharing that gives the coach a fuller picture of the recruit.

Potential Drawbacks of Parent Outreach

While there are benefits, there are also risks parents should weigh when deciding whether to contact college coaches:

Overstepping Boundaries

Some coaches prefer to only hear directly from student-athletes themselves during recruitment. They may see unsolicited parent contact as overstepping boundaries into something that should remain a student-led process.

Too Pushy

Being too aggressive in pitching their child can irritate coaches. They do not want to feel pressured. Savvy coaches see through pushy outreach that attempts to “sell” the athlete versus genuinely get to know the coach and program.

Lack of Maturity and Independence

Coaches want to see student-athletes who can take ownership of their recruitment. Relying on parents to make contacts could convey immaturity, lack of independence or low interest on the student’s behalf.

Misaligned Expectations

Parents sometimes convey inaccurate athletic skill levels or have unrealistic expectations about their child’s chances. This wastes coaches’ valuable time. They prefer to not interact with parents who misrepresent their kids’ abilities.

Too Much Follow Up

Pestering coaches with frequent, extensive follow-up outreach after initial contacts can backfire. Coaches get inundated with interest. Unless they request it, extensive follow up from parents appears desperate or entitled.

False Impressions

The inability to convey nuances beyond words in emails or calls means parents risk conveying inaccurate impressions about their kids. For example, humor or tone can be lost, leading to misinterpretations.

Best Practices for Parents Reaching Out to Coaches

For parents who do decide to contact college coaches, following best practices can help maximize benefits while minimizing risks:

Have Your Child Initiate Contact First

Ideally, student-athletes should be the first point of contact with any new coach. This shows the student is taking ownership and that the parent outreach is supplemental.

Introduce Yourself and Relationship

Clearly introduce yourself with your full name and as the recruit’s parent. Avoid ambiguity about who the coach is interacting with.

Express Clear Purpose

Concisely explain the purpose of your outreach, such as introducing your child, or asking specific procedural questions. Don’t expect coaches to intuit why you are contacting them.

Share Basics, But Let Your Child Provide Details

Give coaches a high-level overview of your child’s athletic experience, accomplishments and skills. Then explain that you will let your son or daughter provide more details about their capabilities.

Remain Professional

Avoid overly effusive praise or “salesy” language – stick to facts. Be polite and patient. Do not try to rush or pressure coaches.

Consider the Coach’s Time

Be succinct and don’t overburden coaches with lengthy emails or calls. They have many athletes to evaluate. Convey key details as efficiently as possible.

Do Not Make Assumptions

Avoid guessing at what the coach may be thinking or feeling towards your child as a recruit. Stick with facts. Do not make bold assumptions about the status of their process or interest level.

Follow the Coach’s Lead

Some coaches prefer limited parent involvement, others are open to more contact. Take cues from how they respond and their communication style to see what they are comfortable with.

Express Appreciation

Regardless of the outcome, thank coaches for their consideration of your student-athlete. Be respectful of their time and the fact that they have difficult decisions given limited roster spots.

Should I Contact Coaches or Not? Questions for Parents to Consider

As parents weigh whether initiating contact with college coaches makes sense, the following questions can help analyze the situation:

Is your student comfortable with it?

The student-athlete’s feelings should guide decisions. If they do not approve of parent outreach, avoid overstepping.

Does it align with your coach-parent dynamic?

Think about your established dynamic. Have you interacted productively with coaches of their youth teams? Or have there been conflicts before?

Is your student a self-advocate?

Can your child independently research schools, initiate contacts and communicate their skills/interests? If so, they may not need parent assistance contacting coaches.

Are you knowledgeable about the sport and recruiting?

To add value, you will need an understanding of the athletic domain and recruiting processes. If lacking knowledge, you risk credibility.

What are the coach’s policies?

Research the coach beforehand – do they seem open to or discourage hearing from parents? Respect stated policies.

Is it needed to get exposure?

For an athlete without existing visibility, a parent intro may help put them on the coach’s radar. But unnecessary for well-known recruits.

Other Parent Support Roles in College Athletics Recruitment

While contacting coaches directly may not always be beneficial or welcomed, parents can support their student-athletes in other valuable ways during the recruiting process:

Provide Guidance on Priorities

Help your child thoughtfully consider the academics, athletics, social scenes, distance from home and other factors most important to them in a school. Discussing priorities helps narrow their options.

Do Background Research on Programs

Use your time to research athletic programs of interest to your child. Share useful details with them that they can reference when communicating with coaches.

Support Communication

Suggest your child create a profile, intro emails or call scripts to use when reaching out to coaches initially. Provide feedback to polish their messaging.

Help Organize

Use spreadsheet or tools to help your athlete track research on schools, coach contacts and notes from conversations. Help keep them organized.

Provide Logistical Support for Visits

Once schools show interest, help coordinate details for campus visits like travel, meals and lodging. Handling logistics allows your child to focus on the experience.

Encourage Persistence

The recruiting process involves many highs and lows. Provide emotional support through disappointments and encourage persistence towards goals.

Celebrate Achievements

Getting admitted to play for a strong athletic program is a major accomplishment. Be sure to celebrate your child’s hard work and commitment over the years.

The college athletic recruitment process can certainly get stressful for students and families. While some parents do choose to contact coaches directly, there are many other positive ways to provide support without overstepping boundaries.Focus on guidance, research, organization and encouragement to put your child in the best position for a positive outcome aligned with their goals and preferences.